Invisible Voices

I sometimes hear voices. Not all of the time. And they never say much more than my name. They will sometimes wake me from a dream and on some occasions, I will hear them while I am fully awake. Now don’t worry. They never tell me to go kill my neighbors dog or anything like that. They are very succinct in what they say. They can be a woman’s voice or a man’s and in at least one instant a young child’s voice. And the only thing they say is “Scott”. I will wake up and look around for who is speaking, knowing full well that there is no one there. But the voices seem so clear and sound as if they are right beside me. A couple of times I have heard them while I was awake and my wife in the next room. I’ve asked her on a couple of occasions if she had said something to me and of course the answer was no. I’m not sure which of the many medications I’m taking is causing my invisible voices, but it is another interesting side effect that I am dealing with.

Recently I’ve been having vivid hallucinations of people. At least with these I know that I am asleep, or rather, the space in between consciousness where your eyes are closed and you hear things going on around you but you have begun the process of slipping off to Neverland. These people never seem to be harmful. It’s almost as if they are just stopping by to chat. Sometimes it is people I know but mostly faces that I never recall ever meeting. I’ve always had a very vivid and imaginative dream life. Someday perhaps I will write a blog or book or something about that. These drugs have definitely taken my subconscious life into a whole new level of strangeness.

I’m pretty sure I don’t need someone putting me in a little white jacket and putting me in a padded room just yet. I might be able to get some good writing material out of this side effect. Although it is 3:51 a.m. When I’m writing this. Insomnia……another side effect. One of the many reasons cancer sucks.

Most everyone’s mad here. You may have noticed that I’m not all there myself. –Cheshire Cat (Alice in Wonderland)

5 Responses to “Invisible Voices”

  1. Georgia Says:

    Enjoyed your writings! Your wit, thoughts and sharings make me smile! ~Georgia

  2. donna Ables Says:

    Sorry you are having all of these side effects will continue to pray for you and Brenda. Know this is a trying time for the both of you Bless you both and stay strong for each other.

  3. Jen F Says:

    I enjoyed reading and sharing this blog with my boys. In our house, you’re the grownup that vacations at Disney – my children still don’t understand why an adult would go to Disney by them self. My prayers and thoughts are of you, Scott.

    • dizscott Says:

      Thanks Jen. I’m glad you enjoyed my blog. Yeah, my dad took me to Disney for the first time when they first opened in 1971. Been going ever since. My dad actually lives near there and still goes all the time. For my family it’s just a magical place to be. Lot of great memories. Thanks for your prayers. They are always needed.

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